So I guess you're expecting a blog post about an awesome new book I read. Well, I did read an awesome new book and I was all set to write a post about it yesterday and have t up today. The book is called Paleofantasy by Marlene Zuk and I loved it. I loved it so much my brain was filled with hearts and stars while I read it. But, I didn't write a post about it. I am now going to be super-lame and explain my day yesterday, chock full of First World Problems.
It all started at 9am, when I was getting ready to leave for work. I like to leave about an hour early so I have time to settle into the day and gauge the mood of everyone around me. I got all of my stuff together and was about to walk out the door, when I realized my keys were not where I usually leave them. Normally, I put them on the table next to the door. I checked my coat pockets. I checked my pants pockets. I checked my backpack, the couch, the floor under the couch, the grocery bag from the day before, I even checked inside the fridge. Nope.
Let me just stop here and explain that I never lose my keys. I'm one of those annoyingly responsible people that always puts things away the moment I'm done using them. After 15 minutes of looking, I finally texted my boyfriend to ask if he had picked them up for some sleep-induced, pre-coffee reason. I was then able to locate the spare set of keys I didn't know I had and be on my way. The clicker on it doesn't work, so when I got to the bookstore, I left the car unlocked and the alarm in valet mode so that I wouldn't need the clicker to get in. Great. Work. Barely on time, but here.
I was scheduled to be in the kid's department all day, most of it by myself because of some staffing conflicts with other members of the kid's crew. It was pretty busy and the customers seemed determined to make a mess the second I thought I was finished picking up. My manager came in on his day off to lend a hand and things were going smoothly. Then he got called away and I was on my own again. None of this is a big deal, it just meant that I couldn't draft out a review for the book. I thought that might happen, so I figured I'd just write it when I got home last night.
Fast forward to 7:08pm when my co-workers and I were getting out to our cars. I grabbed the door handle and pulled. Shit. The car had locked itself, like the glitchy, resentful, little beast that it is. I used my key to unlock it and, sure enough, the alarm went off. An uncontrolled string of swears escaped my mouth. I tried to start the car anyway, but of course that didn't work. I tried waiting for it to stop, then starting it, but that just set it off again. I pulled out the manual and found the part about the emergency shut-off button for the alarm. My co-worker gave me a flashlight and I rooted around under the steering wheel looking for it, when the police show up. I then explained what the heck I was doing with a flashlight under the steering wheel of a car with the alarm going off. Another co-worker gave me a screwdriver to open my clicker and see if any of us had the same battery. No such luck.
I figured I'd just buy a new battery, but the radio shack and the drug store were closed, so that left gas stations and supermarkets. Finally, after trying every open store in town (so maybe 5, tops) my boyfriend had to come to town with my car keys (which it turns out he did take by accident, because he hates me and wants to ruin my life. Except not at all and it was just a long day) and disarm the alarm so we could go home. It was probably 9pm when we finally got home, so there was no way I was writing a book review. Sorry.
That's my lame story. The point is, if you're thinking about moving to a really small town in Vermont, don't. At least not without a working spare set of car keys.